This article has been viewed 25,285 times. It is pointless, leads nowhere and makes it clear you have no intention of seeing their side of things. You can use your body to trick your brain into being easier. Learn more... Getting into an argument can be an extremely stressful experience. The A that happens is some gun restrictions , the Z that happens is that the government takes away everyone's rights. If you find yourself getting upset, take a few deep breaths to calm yourself down and keep your voice even when you respond. It's one that nobody wins. Don't get into an argument over social media, whether it's through Facebook, Tumblr, Twitter, etc. He maintains that your attitude has been the problem. If your arguments rely on moral equivalence you should rethink what you're actually arguing. Please consider making a contribution to wikiHow today. How do I win an argument against my dad? "Whatever..." If you're trying to have an argument with someone and you or the other person keeps saying "whatever" to the points being made, you aren't engaging respectfully and need to postpone the argument to another time, or indefinitely. wikiHow is a “wiki,” similar to Wikipedia, which means that many of our articles are co-written by multiple authors. Remember, that this article can only give you tips for ways to make it more likely that you'll win an argument. If you find yourself distracted or unclear, ask clarifying questions so that you make sure you understand their point. An example of ad populum: "If you don't support the Iraq war, you aren't a true American (you're a terrorist)." Before you get into the argument remind yourself why you care about this person and about the relationship you have with them (it could be as simple as "they are my boss and I'm going to need their good will some day" to "this is my daughter who I care about very much and am concerned about some of the decisions she's been making lately."). This can also be a good time to decide whether the argument is actually worth having. Not that passivity is the most effective strategy but if you’re thinking about “winning” you’re already headed down the wrong path. This will help keep you calmer. Say to them "Hey, I think this is something we really need to discuss, but I'd like a little time to cool down and talk about it calmly. If you're arguing politics, or religion, etc. This way you can see if there are any holes or fallacies in your argument. For example: you and your boss get into an argument about your boss's treatment of you (you feel like he's bullying you and saying incredibly hurtful things). Don't get sucked into this kind of argument. Amid the current public health and economic crises, when the world is shifting dramatically and we are all learning and adapting to changes in daily life, people need wikiHow more than ever. These are incredibly harmful and abusive behaviors and there is literally no reason ever to use either of these tactics (the only place violence is allowed is if someone has physical hurt you and you are in fear for your life; get away from them as quickly as possible). Either that, or they want to derail the conversation. If you really can’t stand to see another ad again, then please consider supporting our work with a contribution to wikiHow. If you have to have an argument over the phone, follow the instructions to remain calm and deep breathe and be specific about the situation. If you find yourself in an argument online, try to remain calm and use clear and well-reasoned points that are backed up by evidence. A way to ensure that you don't rant is by being careful not to fume over something for a long time––face it, deal with it and move on from it. By using our site, you agree to our. Say something like "I'm sorry, but I find the assertion you made that I'm lazy extremely upsetting. To create this article, 20 people, some anonymous, worked to edit and improve it over time. Link to it directly and explain why it is a valuable source. When an issue comes up that causes friction between the two of you, ask them for some space and time to think it over. Being able to explain the process by which you came to your opinion can further strengthen your argument. "I am the parent and you are the child" or "The customer is always right")? There are different levels of winning an argument. Please consider making a contribution to wikiHow today. I have incriminating evidence against an opponent in an argument, but I obtained it less than truthfully, and I would get caught if I used it against him. This article has been viewed 25,285 times. Maybe your attitude has made things worse (instead of confronting him immediately about his behavior, you took a more passive aggressive route). It can be tempting to get out your words as quickly and as loudly as possible, but the more time you take to say what you need to say, the more calmly you come across. All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published. The more specific the better: if you're fighting with your boss, for example, offer up specific instances of the times when he bullied you and how that made you feel (tearing you down in front of other people, calling you names, things he's said behind your back to other people, etc). Don't engage this person. For example: Any restrictions on who can buy guns in the U.S. means that the government wants to take away all your rights. A girl who I call almost daily has an argument waiting for me, and whenever I use proof, she just says it's not true. This type of argument derails the conversation so that the other person (or you) is forced to keep explaining that your viewpoint is more complicated than "you never do anything right" to your partner. Remember, particularly when it comes to these types of subjects, people find it very hard to stay calm and give a rational account of their views. To win an argument, think before you speak and deliver your arguments in a calm, rational manner. Winning an argument isn't worth incriminating yourself. No one ever wins those arguments and the people who start them tend to be trolls. Avoid making embarrassing mistakes on Zoom! This is why when something becomes an issue in a relationship (any relationship) you should document it, so that you can show that it's a pattern rather than an isolated incident. % of people told us that this article helped them. When the other person is making their points, make sure to look them in the eye and really listen to what they are saying. If you can't choose the place, Try to find an out-of-the-way corner and that you aren't having the argument under the eyes of everyone around you. You can’t You will need to bring specific facts to play and avoid logical fallacies (discussed below). Try to avoid having an argument in a crowded place where you both will be easily distracted. Don’t let your opponent sense that you’re digging into your position without being willing to … Don't have this sort of discussion when you're going to be interrupted by phone calls and text alerts (best to turn your phone off or put it on silent). You’ve been there. Try to say a lot with few words for a powerful and digestible argument. If you write large chunks of text, it is unlikely that your interlocutors will go through and read it all. You should also avoid making vague generalizations like “you never help out around the house,” since these are easy for the other person to brush off.